Two ceramic cups with blue and beige glaze, one displaying partial text 'I FUCKING L...' and the other showing 'NG LOVE YOU'.

An

improper

pottery

studio

Beautiful hand-thrown pottery with a bloody good vocabulary. Not for the woke. Or those lacking a sense of humour.

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Carefully crafted ceramics meeting unapologetic language

Table set with a vase of flowers, two wine glasses filled with white wine, a bottle of white wine, a small bowl of green olives, and decorative plates with text, in a modern kitchen with dark cabinets and open shelves.
A dog with light fur eating from a ceramic bowl on a wooden floor inside a home. The bowl has the word 'FUCKWIT' printed on it.
A cozy living room with a light wood coffee table holding a ceramic cup labeled 'PLONKER', stacked books, a candle, and glasses on a round woven coaster. In the background, there is a cream sofa with patterned pillows, a side table with a white vase and dried pampas grass, and beige curtains.

Each Profanity Pot is made by hand in small batches just outside Chichester. No factories. No shortcuts. Just proper pottery with a sense of humour. Slight variations in colour, size and finish are expected — and celebrated. If you’re after perfect uniformity, you’re probably in the wrong place.

Whether you’re buying for a friend who’s impossible to shop for, or treating yourself to something that makes you laugh every time you see it, you’re in the right place.

Perfect for gifting or keeping. We won’t judge.

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the

sweary

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Each Profanity Pot is handmade, meaning no two are exactly the same — a bit like people, but with better attitudes.

Out of stock? Relax — the kiln’s busy.

Get first dibs on the next batch.

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Personalised Profanities

Handmade. Limited. Profanity included.

When they’re gone, they’re gone — until the next batch emerges from the kiln, fingers crossed and swearing optional but encouraged.

Out of stock or want your own profanity. First come, first served. Spaces are limited.

Commissions: please allow a minimum of 4-6 weeks.

No spam. No waffle. Just pots. And words you shouldn’t say at dinner.

Wall of Fame

Your Commissioned Chaos

Sunset over a pebble beach with wooden posts and a solitary navigational sign by the water.
A man wearing a black cap and dark jacket is eating a potato chip from a bowl. The bowl has a phrase that says 'Don't be a Yorkshire Cunt' on the rim and is filled with potato chips. The man appears to be enjoying himself.
Heart-shaped ceramic dish with blue speckles and the words 'I like you' inscribed in the center.
A small ceramic bowl with black interior and beige exterior, with the words 'OLD BAG' written on it, placed on a white surface.
Decorative ceramic plate with the phrase 'Knob of Cheese' and a painted blue and green design.
A ceramic mug with a blue glazed top and a beige bottom, with the word 'HELMET' spelled out in black letter tiles on the front.
A beige and light blue ceramic cup with the words 'FUCK NO' written on it.
A yellow Labrador Retriever dog eating from a ceramic bowl with the word "FUCKWIT" inscribed on it, indoors on a wooden floor with furniture and a fireplace in the background.
A peaceful beach scene with a clear blue sky, streaked with white clouds, the sun low on the horizon, reflecting off calm ocean waters, and pebbles covering the shoreline.
Ceramic cup with a green and beige glazed finish, with the word 'ENTITLED' spelled out in black letters on the beige base.
A dirt path through sand dunes with dry grass under a clear blue sky.
A stainless steel espresso machine brewing coffee into a mug with the phrase "DON'T BE A DICK" written on it.
A ceramic mug with the words 'PENCIL DICK' embossed on the front, featuring a textured beige surface and blue and green glazing accents.
A ceramic mug with a blue, green, and beige color pattern, inscribed with the words "THANK F***" on the beige base.
A small dog standing on a sandy pathway between tall beach grass at the top of a dune under a clear blue sky.
A ceramic mug with a beige bottom and a light blue, textured glaze on the upper part, with the word 'BESTIE' in blue letters on the bottom edge.
A person stands in shallow water near the beach, looking at the ocean, with other swimmers farther out. The beach has dark sand and seaweed, and there are cliffs in the distance under a cloudy sky.
Ceramic bowl with an uneven, wavy rim, decorated with blue, black, and beige glazes, on a white surface
Sunset over the ocean with a pebble beach in the foreground and a small weather hut on the right side.
A set of three handmade ceramic pots with blue and beige glaze, each labeled with a word, arranged on a white surface. The front pot is labeled 'TWAT', the middle one 'PER VERT', and the back one has an illegible label.
A small ceramic bowl with a beige exterior and blue glaze inside, featuring the words 'RING PIECE' spelled out with letter beads or blocks on the side.
A ceramic mug with a blue and brown glaze, with the words 'DICK HEAD' written on the lower part.
Glass pipe bowl with decorative blue patterns and the text 'PISS OFF BUNKER' around the hole.
Sunset over a pebble beach with a calm ocean and a clear blue sky with wispy clouds.
A ceramic mug with blue, green, and beige glaze, with the word 'BASTARD' spelled out in letter tiles at the bottom.
The bottom of a mug with Scrabble letter tiles spelling out 'FUCK IT' inside.
Ceramic mug with a color gradient from beige to blue with the words 'GYM GUNT' printed at the bottom.
Sunset over the beach with calm waves, wet sand, and scattered seaweed and rocks.
A person shaping a clay wheel on a pottery wheel, with their fingers pressing into the spinning clay.
Ceramic mug with a glazed pale blue top half and a tan bottom half, featuring the text 'LICKING DRAMA' on the bottom.
Three ceramic cups with watercolor-like glaze and handwritten labels: 'WINNER', 'FUCOFFEE', and 'ENTITLED'.
Minimalist line art bicycle illustration on a dark background
A ceramic pot with pastel blue and beige glaze, featuring the phrase 'POSITIVE PANTS ON' in black lettering.
A person is carving words into a ceramic mug, which reads 'FUCKING LOVE'. The person's hand is holding the mug steady while using a tool to inscribe the text.
Two ceramic cups with a rustic design and glaze sit on a wooden table in a cozy, industrial-style living room with exposed brick walls and a sofa with cushions in the background.
A beach at sunset with a sandy shoreline, scattered shells and footprints, and weathered water barriers in the distance, with a colorful sky and the silhouette of dunes or buildings on the horizon.

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Beautifully made. Shamelessly spoken.

Hand Jobs

Every piece is thrown by hand, glazed with care, and stamped with words you probably shouldn’t say at dinner… but absolutely should put on your shelf.

Small Batch

Slight variations, tiny imperfections and gloriously rude words are all part of the charm.

Limited f*ing edition

We operate in Kiln chaos creating tiny runs with massive personality but Limited, like our patience.